They say "Home is where the heart is." And that's just my problem right now. My heart is in so many pieces, and I've left those pieces in so many places that I don't quite know where I should go or where I should be.
There's a piece of my heart on the coast of California wading in the Pacific Ocean. Those granite sandy beaches constantly shaped by the crashing of waves calls to my toes and feet. The seemingly endless sun rays always ready to kiss my freckled cheeks, nose and shoulders. The slimy strands of kelp clinging to my legs begs me to dive and discover the mysteries held in the giant kelp forests. My heart will always long to be close to the ocean.
Utah also holds quite a bit of my heart. The Wasatch mountain skyline is embossed in the depths of my soul. The quickly changing ecosystems from cold desert scrub to high alpine peaks is so tantalizing to me. Plus Utah is where I first experienced 4 seasons. Not to mention that Utah is where I "grew" up as in; I became a young adult while living in Utah. Those were good years to me.
The lush green land and grey skies of Seattle hold a very special piece of my heart. One I'll never get back. While I never intended to stay in Washington when I moved there for graduate school, my heart told me something different half way through and I followed it. I'm a better women for it.
Washington's turbulent weather is what first captured my heart. I didn't quite understand the weather patterns that were happening and I decided to dedicate a big part of my graduate years to figuring out how it all works. I never knew the conversation about weather could be so very fascinating.
The people of Washington captured my heart as well. I met such amazing people... hippies, liberals, free thinkers, open minded, kind, welcoming people. People who I connected with in a way I never had before. A part of me was discovered and released. I felt a part of something bigger when I am with them. Plus I have this group of valiant, stalwart women and men I was blessed to be surrounded with during the most heart-wrenching experience of my life. I found love and lost it. Washington will always be home.
Then there is the cactus studded skies of Arizona. I escaped to Arizona when I left Washington last year. Nothing is more polar opposites than Arizona and Washington. But that's probably what has allowed me to let my heart be open again. It is such a foreign place to me. I threw myself into trying to learn the names of odd looking plants during that trip. And into the arms of loving friends. For some reason I feel a growing connection to this place. This place of dry, intense heat... and yet still full of life. The plants and animals have learned to live here; I feel I can too. Last year my life was like this land of dry, intense heat...yet still so full of life. And so, my connection grows even stronger.
I've thought about this word "Home" a lot. While some reserve it for the place they lay their head down at night. I use it freely to describe a place I feel alive and at peace. Home will always be a place created by ALL the places I've lived and the experiences I've had. Home is where the people I love are. Home is where I feel connected to the land. Home is where I feel most like ME!
I don't know where I'll end up living in the next few months. It may just be back where a piece of my heart is. Or it may be a new place that I will learn to love. That's one of my favorite things about me... I can find beauty and fall in love with so very many places. But this I know for sure: Wherever I end up living, will be HOME.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Unsettled
I need to write tonight. I'm learning that writing what is in my heart and soul is therapeutic and releases a burden my spirit feels.
I'm not really sure what is in my heart and soul right now. And I think that is what the problem is. So don't expect too much from this post.
I have been so anxious and unsettled these past few weeks. As I finished school a week ago, I've come to realize the time has come where I have to make new life decisions. I have to decide what my next move is going to be. And it's all been very unsettling.
Ever since I suddenly moved back to Utah, I've literally moved every 3 to 4 months. I guess you can say it's a lifestyle I've adapted to. Many of my favorite things from my life in Washington have remained in boxes. And every time I moved, less and less of my things have moved with me.
I thought I was ready to settle down. I was excited to pick a place to call my new home and move forward with life, until last week.
When the possibility of having to actually choose arose, I went into full panic mode. In a very emotional week, I came to realize why I was panicking; my next decision is in a very symbolic and real way me acknowledging that this phase of my life is done. That I am moving forward. There's no more little tiny hole for the possibility of reconciliation with Jeremy. While I didn't live the last year thinking that would happen... there was always the what if's lingering and a bit of hope. When I move forward with life. I am acknowledging that chapter of life is done. It's heartbreaking and scary.
It also means a life without my Dad. One that he isn't around to participate in. He's not here to give his input (even if I usually ended up doing what he didn't want me to do: move away), and that is really hard to accept. At least he knew this place that I'm living in now, and he knew I was going to be doing my student teaching. But now I feel like life is going to move past these milestones and he doesn't get to participate.
While part of me longs and yearns for a place to call home again, I sometimes wonder if I'm made to stay in one place for a long time. Maybe I'm meant to be a vagabond moving about. And then I remember my dear friends and can't imagine life without them.
Part of me longs to be out on an adventure, but deep down the core of me knows that no adventure is as fun by yourself as it is when you share it with someone else.
Most of my things will remain in boxes for months. I'm sure it will be a very emotional day when I am unpacking boxes that came from a different period of my life. Perhaps it will be a good emotional day. Perhaps I will finally feel settled again. Who knows.
And so while I wrestle with these realizations and the future possibilities I remain unsettled- heart and soul.
I'm not really sure what is in my heart and soul right now. And I think that is what the problem is. So don't expect too much from this post.
I have been so anxious and unsettled these past few weeks. As I finished school a week ago, I've come to realize the time has come where I have to make new life decisions. I have to decide what my next move is going to be. And it's all been very unsettling.
Ever since I suddenly moved back to Utah, I've literally moved every 3 to 4 months. I guess you can say it's a lifestyle I've adapted to. Many of my favorite things from my life in Washington have remained in boxes. And every time I moved, less and less of my things have moved with me.
I thought I was ready to settle down. I was excited to pick a place to call my new home and move forward with life, until last week.
When the possibility of having to actually choose arose, I went into full panic mode. In a very emotional week, I came to realize why I was panicking; my next decision is in a very symbolic and real way me acknowledging that this phase of my life is done. That I am moving forward. There's no more little tiny hole for the possibility of reconciliation with Jeremy. While I didn't live the last year thinking that would happen... there was always the what if's lingering and a bit of hope. When I move forward with life. I am acknowledging that chapter of life is done. It's heartbreaking and scary.
It also means a life without my Dad. One that he isn't around to participate in. He's not here to give his input (even if I usually ended up doing what he didn't want me to do: move away), and that is really hard to accept. At least he knew this place that I'm living in now, and he knew I was going to be doing my student teaching. But now I feel like life is going to move past these milestones and he doesn't get to participate.
While part of me longs and yearns for a place to call home again, I sometimes wonder if I'm made to stay in one place for a long time. Maybe I'm meant to be a vagabond moving about. And then I remember my dear friends and can't imagine life without them.
Part of me longs to be out on an adventure, but deep down the core of me knows that no adventure is as fun by yourself as it is when you share it with someone else.
Most of my things will remain in boxes for months. I'm sure it will be a very emotional day when I am unpacking boxes that came from a different period of my life. Perhaps it will be a good emotional day. Perhaps I will finally feel settled again. Who knows.
And so while I wrestle with these realizations and the future possibilities I remain unsettled- heart and soul.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Flowers
As Valentines day approached this year, I was dreading it just a little bit. I've always like Valentines, but mostly because of my Dad and Mom. In my family there are two Valentines Day traditions. My mom always made heart shaped Sugar cookies with yummy pink frosting. And then she'd pipe our names on one in white frosting. I love those cookies. My Dad always sent me flowers and a poem he wrote. No matter where I was flowers magically appeared. But I knew this year neither of those would happen (because I'm not eating sugar, and Dad's not around).
At school the kids could buy a rose or a candy bar and have it delivered to the person of their choice. The day before Valentines one of my little 7th graders received a rose during class. She turned BRIGHT RED and all the boys in the class started to tease her. And in that moment I remembered the first time I received flowers from my Dad.
It was Feb. 1995, I was a freshman in my new small school, Delta High. I didn't have many friends just yet and I longed for a boy to like me (puberty I tell ya). I got called to the office and there on the counter was a giant bouquet of flowers. My heart skipped a beat. Did someone like me?!
Yes, someone did. My dad. I remember feeling really embarrassed that my Dad sent me flowers. And now I had to ride the bus all the way home with the group of boys I liked the most teasing me.
So I stopped the class and to try to turn the attention away from this girl so her skin color could turn to normal, I told that story to my students. And about how my Dad never missed a Valentines day and that this was my first one (being single) without him. Then suddenly the arm of one of the boys shot up, "Ms. Smith, I know what you should do. You should take your Dad some flowers on Valentines day."
I just shook my head and tried to hold back the tears.
To my surprise just when I thought I'd have my first Valentines without flowers a large bouquet of flowers showed up to school.
I miss my Dad. And I imagine I will miss him most on Valentines Day. But I'll be taking him some flowers each year, as my thoughtful student suggested.
Love you Dad!
At school the kids could buy a rose or a candy bar and have it delivered to the person of their choice. The day before Valentines one of my little 7th graders received a rose during class. She turned BRIGHT RED and all the boys in the class started to tease her. And in that moment I remembered the first time I received flowers from my Dad.
It was Feb. 1995, I was a freshman in my new small school, Delta High. I didn't have many friends just yet and I longed for a boy to like me (puberty I tell ya). I got called to the office and there on the counter was a giant bouquet of flowers. My heart skipped a beat. Did someone like me?!
Yes, someone did. My dad. I remember feeling really embarrassed that my Dad sent me flowers. And now I had to ride the bus all the way home with the group of boys I liked the most teasing me.
So I stopped the class and to try to turn the attention away from this girl so her skin color could turn to normal, I told that story to my students. And about how my Dad never missed a Valentines day and that this was my first one (being single) without him. Then suddenly the arm of one of the boys shot up, "Ms. Smith, I know what you should do. You should take your Dad some flowers on Valentines day."
I just shook my head and tried to hold back the tears.
To my surprise just when I thought I'd have my first Valentines without flowers a large bouquet of flowers showed up to school.
I miss my Dad. And I imagine I will miss him most on Valentines Day. But I'll be taking him some flowers each year, as my thoughtful student suggested.
Love you Dad!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
In my Element
I started my student teaching earlier this month. I was placed at Olympus Jr. High here in Salt Lake. I'm REALLY liking it so far. I completely took over teaching the 7th grade classes this week and I'll be taking over 9th as well next week. I was a bit nervous and worried how to switch from one teacher who has a different classroom management style than I prefer, but I just laid down the law for my 7th graders and they seem to be going along with it.
Today, my third day in charge, my mentor teacher left on a field trip. I felt completely at ease and in control. Each day this week, as I've began class I have just had a feeling like I'm in my element. It's an awesome feeling. It's not just feeling capable, but a reassurance that I'm doing the right thing. I love that.
One of my new favorite words is Skelitive. On Monday I did a little pre-assessment activity, and one kid listed under the different body systems- Skelitive. It was classic.
My biggest challenge, is doing all the details of my lesson plans. I have great, big ideas. But putting forth all the effort in the details to make the big ideas happen.... is a bit painful. It's been that way my whole life. Hopefully one day it will get easier... or I'll find a teacher who likes to collaborate AND who is good at details. In the meantime, my Mom has offered to help (Perk #289 for living with my Mom).
Today, my third day in charge, my mentor teacher left on a field trip. I felt completely at ease and in control. Each day this week, as I've began class I have just had a feeling like I'm in my element. It's an awesome feeling. It's not just feeling capable, but a reassurance that I'm doing the right thing. I love that.
One of my new favorite words is Skelitive. On Monday I did a little pre-assessment activity, and one kid listed under the different body systems- Skelitive. It was classic.
My biggest challenge, is doing all the details of my lesson plans. I have great, big ideas. But putting forth all the effort in the details to make the big ideas happen.... is a bit painful. It's been that way my whole life. Hopefully one day it will get easier... or I'll find a teacher who likes to collaborate AND who is good at details. In the meantime, my Mom has offered to help (Perk #289 for living with my Mom).
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Over and Over
"I don't want to start over."
That's what I told my mom last night. Being at school with middle schooler's is such a nice distraction from life. I'm really enjoying. But by the time my mom got home last night, I just couldn't keep the tears back. I was consumed by the above thought.
See, I spent Saturday afternoon with my friend Dave Ullah. We've been friends since Fall of 2000. That's 11 years! We went to lunch at a Middle Eastern place (I wanted ethnic, Dave is Pakistani), then toured some geothermal homes I was interested in and ended up at the Millcreek nursery spending over an hour helping Dave pick some house plants and pots for those plants. Conversation is always good with Dave. We started talking about his dating life... then it turned to mine (I don't have one). Dave asked the litmus question, "Was I ready to start dating?" I've been thinking about it for awhile now. And I told him yes! It's even made it on my list of 24 things to do in 2012. I was feeling optimistic. I told him I intended to attend the single adult ward here in Salt Lake. He said, "Don't go with high expectations. I went once and I've never been back." (He goes to his family ward)
I went to church, I wasn't too nervous because the librarian at my school is in my ward so I figured I'd have an automatic friend. I'm friendly, and I like people, but I can be quiet and reserved when I don't know anyone. I walked in to church and was completely overwhelmed with how EXTREMELY HUGE the ward is. I'm telling you it's more like a stake conference than a ward. Really. I wouldn't lie about that. I don't know how I'll ever see the same people twice. Ironically, one of my oldest brothers good friend from California goes to that ward. When I saw him in Sunday school he turned around and said, "Abbie, aren't you like still 18... you're not supposed to be here."
Needless to say, I came home from church feeling really lost and insignificant, and overwhelmed. How am I ever going to make friends, meet people to date? I told my mom that afternoon that I hope people I know, know people that they think I should meet and go on a date with because I don't think I can do this again.
Then snowpocalypse hits Seattle, and I'm feeling really homesick. Homesick for those wonderful days bundled up at home with Jeremy. Homesick for my friends in Seattle and other places. I have THE most awesome friends, and I just want to be with you all... not trying to make new ones.
I'm trying to tell myself to stay OPEN (my word for 2012).
I'm not giving up.
(but seriously... know anyone you think I'd get along with?)
That's what I told my mom last night. Being at school with middle schooler's is such a nice distraction from life. I'm really enjoying. But by the time my mom got home last night, I just couldn't keep the tears back. I was consumed by the above thought.
See, I spent Saturday afternoon with my friend Dave Ullah. We've been friends since Fall of 2000. That's 11 years! We went to lunch at a Middle Eastern place (I wanted ethnic, Dave is Pakistani), then toured some geothermal homes I was interested in and ended up at the Millcreek nursery spending over an hour helping Dave pick some house plants and pots for those plants. Conversation is always good with Dave. We started talking about his dating life... then it turned to mine (I don't have one). Dave asked the litmus question, "Was I ready to start dating?" I've been thinking about it for awhile now. And I told him yes! It's even made it on my list of 24 things to do in 2012. I was feeling optimistic. I told him I intended to attend the single adult ward here in Salt Lake. He said, "Don't go with high expectations. I went once and I've never been back." (He goes to his family ward)
I went to church, I wasn't too nervous because the librarian at my school is in my ward so I figured I'd have an automatic friend. I'm friendly, and I like people, but I can be quiet and reserved when I don't know anyone. I walked in to church and was completely overwhelmed with how EXTREMELY HUGE the ward is. I'm telling you it's more like a stake conference than a ward. Really. I wouldn't lie about that. I don't know how I'll ever see the same people twice. Ironically, one of my oldest brothers good friend from California goes to that ward. When I saw him in Sunday school he turned around and said, "Abbie, aren't you like still 18... you're not supposed to be here."
Needless to say, I came home from church feeling really lost and insignificant, and overwhelmed. How am I ever going to make friends, meet people to date? I told my mom that afternoon that I hope people I know, know people that they think I should meet and go on a date with because I don't think I can do this again.
Then snowpocalypse hits Seattle, and I'm feeling really homesick. Homesick for those wonderful days bundled up at home with Jeremy. Homesick for my friends in Seattle and other places. I have THE most awesome friends, and I just want to be with you all... not trying to make new ones.
I'm trying to tell myself to stay OPEN (my word for 2012).
I'm not giving up.
(but seriously... know anyone you think I'd get along with?)
Monday, January 16, 2012
Year in Review via Cupcakes
After I read through my year in review post I realized there were major parts of my life missing that I didn't want to forget. Like how incredibly happy I am that I got to build friendships with all my nephews. They are so precious!
And then there are all the cupcakes (and other baked goods) I made this year. I don't know what it is about cupcakes specifically, but I love them. I think for me it's the giving them away part that is the best. The first time I made a batch in Kirkland and drove around giving them away (so I wouldn't eat them all) really got me hooked. I loved seeing the surprise on everyone's faces. Nothing better... maybe I should be a delivery person for a flowershop or something. I think I get the same feeling day in and day out!
January- Alicia's Lil' Peanut Baby Shower
February- I made Kumquat cupcakes and delivered to some friends before I moved (no pictures)
March- Birthday Cupcakes for my 3 sister in-laws. I think it's cool that they all have birthdays in March
July and August- I branched our with Cake Pops for Pioneer Day and a Trifle for Joie's birthday
October- Churro Cupcakes for final in Content Area Literacy
November- Apple Strussel Cheesecake Bites for my birthday... and then again for Thanksgiving
December- For Alina's baby shower I made Chocolate and Raspberry cupcakes
And I attempted to make Llama cupcakes for my Dad's birthday
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Year in Review
I'm finally settling into my room at my parents apartment in Salt Lake City. Life has been so full these past two weeks that I haven't unpacked until today. As I did so I came across my green planner that my sister put in my care box she gave to me the morning I moved to Utah. It was an awful time in my life, and she was so thoughtful to send me off with a box full of things to bring me comfort. The note on my planner said, "To plan for your new future." Tonight I picked up the planner and started to thumb through it. So much has happened this year.
As the end of the year approached, my family and I had been seriously anticipating the close of this most trying year. We talked and talked about how glad we would be to see this year end and leave us alone. Then my Dad passed away on December 30th. While I knew for months that my Dad wouldn't make it to the new year, it was a difficult, yet peaceful day.
I found myself on New Years Eve, eating dinner with my whole family (expect Dad) realizing I didn't feel as happy as I thought I'd be to be seeing the year end. It meant, I'd never see my Dad for the rest of my mortal life. It meant I'd probably never see Jeremy again. It meant the end to so much that I loved, and while I am hopeful for the future, it was a hard realization for me.
I tried hard that night to stop reflecting on the hard things of the year and focus on all the good things that happened... there were so many. So here's the 2011 RECAP (the good and the not so good):
January...the most stressful, trying month of my life to date. Jeremy and I separated at the end of the month.
February...I packed up my life and belongings and moved to Utah. My awesome sister's in-law filled up my first few days back in Utah (I don't know if they did it on purpose, but it was the best thing that could have happened). Met up with my life time friend Melanie for lunch. Took a last minute trip to Cali to see my grandparents. Had an awesome job interview, was offered the job, but for some reason I felt it wasn't right and turned it down. Val and Chris graciously fly me out to D.C. to spend just over a week with them and then to Arizona to be with Megan Ruth.
March... While in Arizona, Mom calls and tells me they've found a mass in my Dad's brain. The day I fly back we meet with the doctors and Dad is diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. My sisters come home right before surgery and I ask the amazing Justin Hackworth to take pictures while we hold a family dinner. Best decision of the YEAR! Spent my days taking Dad from one doctor's appointment to the next. Dad has successful brain surgery.
April... Most days spent at home helping to take care of Dad post surgery. Ran a 5K with Val and Chris in SLC. Went to Melanie's baby shower. Had my first interview with Ogden Valley Science School. We host a HUGELY successful garage sale.
May... Ran the Provo 5K with Katie. Attended first Rooftop Concert with Andy and Alina. Flew to Seattle. Spent a wonderful day with Amanda, Zoe and Alton. Went to court the next day, upon seeing Jeremy for the first time since February, I can't stop crying. WORST DAY EVER. Had a lovely lunch with my Kirkland friends (I miss you all terribly)! Flew back to Salt Lake and started my summer job as Summer Program Director for Ogden Valley Science School.
June... Moved to Eden! Started camp and completed 3 successful weeks. Visited my cousin, Jessica, in Bear Lake and helped with her Fight Against Cancer 5K.
Somewhere in there I planted my parents garden that Dad wanted so badly!
July... We had the BEST Smith Family 4th of July ever! Completed 2 more successful weeks of camp. Rob, Katie, Lincoln and Sawyer come visit me in Eden. Threw and awesome Pioneer Day party (complete with friends from Washington who POPPED in). Lunch with the Brough's and Dave Ullah. Ben came from Arizona to visit me at camp in Eden. Road trip to the Uinta's to have lunch with Dad at the trail head.
August... Finished camp and the relaxed in sunny St. George with the Burnham's. Ran my first (and last) 1/2 marathon. The Hartely's came to visit, we had dinner with the Burnham's. Moved in with my little brother and family and quickly started classes at BYU.
September... Nathan came to visit just before school officially took over my life. Dad had his first stroke, spent the night in the ER. Had a wonderful time at my cousin's wedding.
October... Finished 2 classes, started one more. Rooftop concert with new friend from school. Started spending Tuesday and Thursday afternoons with my Dad = best decision of the year. BYU football game with the Mo's and Dave Ullah. Awesome Imagine Dragons concert at Velour with Emily.
November...Spent my 31st birthday in Arizona. Hiked around the Natural Bridge. Caught up with my childhood friend, Jesse, after I don't know how many years. Saw the best RV demolition derby EVER with The Guderian's, the Lindstrom's and Ben. Dad was honored at the JCC. First thanksgiving with my family after 6 years = I got to eat stuffing and gravy!
December...Finished classes (straight A's)! Moved to SLC. Spent as much time with my Dad and family as possible including Zoo lights, temple square, a fantastic birthday party for my dad and a wonderful family Christmas party. Dinner with Val, Chris, Melanie and Mark. Dad passed away and we spent New Year's eve as a family.
As the end of the year approached, my family and I had been seriously anticipating the close of this most trying year. We talked and talked about how glad we would be to see this year end and leave us alone. Then my Dad passed away on December 30th. While I knew for months that my Dad wouldn't make it to the new year, it was a difficult, yet peaceful day.
I found myself on New Years Eve, eating dinner with my whole family (expect Dad) realizing I didn't feel as happy as I thought I'd be to be seeing the year end. It meant, I'd never see my Dad for the rest of my mortal life. It meant I'd probably never see Jeremy again. It meant the end to so much that I loved, and while I am hopeful for the future, it was a hard realization for me.
I tried hard that night to stop reflecting on the hard things of the year and focus on all the good things that happened... there were so many. So here's the 2011 RECAP (the good and the not so good):
January...the most stressful, trying month of my life to date. Jeremy and I separated at the end of the month.
February...I packed up my life and belongings and moved to Utah. My awesome sister's in-law filled up my first few days back in Utah (I don't know if they did it on purpose, but it was the best thing that could have happened). Met up with my life time friend Melanie for lunch. Took a last minute trip to Cali to see my grandparents. Had an awesome job interview, was offered the job, but for some reason I felt it wasn't right and turned it down. Val and Chris graciously fly me out to D.C. to spend just over a week with them and then to Arizona to be with Megan Ruth.
March... While in Arizona, Mom calls and tells me they've found a mass in my Dad's brain. The day I fly back we meet with the doctors and Dad is diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. My sisters come home right before surgery and I ask the amazing Justin Hackworth to take pictures while we hold a family dinner. Best decision of the YEAR! Spent my days taking Dad from one doctor's appointment to the next. Dad has successful brain surgery.April... Most days spent at home helping to take care of Dad post surgery. Ran a 5K with Val and Chris in SLC. Went to Melanie's baby shower. Had my first interview with Ogden Valley Science School. We host a HUGELY successful garage sale.
May... Ran the Provo 5K with Katie. Attended first Rooftop Concert with Andy and Alina. Flew to Seattle. Spent a wonderful day with Amanda, Zoe and Alton. Went to court the next day, upon seeing Jeremy for the first time since February, I can't stop crying. WORST DAY EVER. Had a lovely lunch with my Kirkland friends (I miss you all terribly)! Flew back to Salt Lake and started my summer job as Summer Program Director for Ogden Valley Science School.
June... Moved to Eden! Started camp and completed 3 successful weeks. Visited my cousin, Jessica, in Bear Lake and helped with her Fight Against Cancer 5K.Somewhere in there I planted my parents garden that Dad wanted so badly!
July... We had the BEST Smith Family 4th of July ever! Completed 2 more successful weeks of camp. Rob, Katie, Lincoln and Sawyer come visit me in Eden. Threw and awesome Pioneer Day party (complete with friends from Washington who POPPED in). Lunch with the Brough's and Dave Ullah. Ben came from Arizona to visit me at camp in Eden. Road trip to the Uinta's to have lunch with Dad at the trail head.
August... Finished camp and the relaxed in sunny St. George with the Burnham's. Ran my first (and last) 1/2 marathon. The Hartely's came to visit, we had dinner with the Burnham's. Moved in with my little brother and family and quickly started classes at BYU.September... Nathan came to visit just before school officially took over my life. Dad had his first stroke, spent the night in the ER. Had a wonderful time at my cousin's wedding.
October... Finished 2 classes, started one more. Rooftop concert with new friend from school. Started spending Tuesday and Thursday afternoons with my Dad = best decision of the year. BYU football game with the Mo's and Dave Ullah. Awesome Imagine Dragons concert at Velour with Emily.
November...Spent my 31st birthday in Arizona. Hiked around the Natural Bridge. Caught up with my childhood friend, Jesse, after I don't know how many years. Saw the best RV demolition derby EVER with The Guderian's, the Lindstrom's and Ben. Dad was honored at the JCC. First thanksgiving with my family after 6 years = I got to eat stuffing and gravy!December...Finished classes (straight A's)! Moved to SLC. Spent as much time with my Dad and family as possible including Zoo lights, temple square, a fantastic birthday party for my dad and a wonderful family Christmas party. Dinner with Val, Chris, Melanie and Mark. Dad passed away and we spent New Year's eve as a family.
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